Let go of the 'rules' so you can show up consistently and confidently for your audience.

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Hello, and welcome to another episode of Create Lead Live!

I'm Emily Wilks, and I'm really grateful that you've decided to join me today.

Today, I'm gonna be talking to you about letting go of the rules, fears, doubts and expectations you carry, that have been standing in the way of you showing up consistently and confidently for your audience.

The reason I want to chat about this is because, the number one thing that stops entrepreneurs from showing up and shining their light and magic out into the world, and being a consistent presence in the life of their dream clients and audience, is the internal limited thoughts and beliefs they carry!

For instance, the 'rules' we've internalised about how we 'should' be showing up. Or the expectations we've taken on board based on what we've seen others doing or that we believe is expected in the industry we're in. Eg. showing up on reels, recording videos, creating a podcast, or posting multiple times a day on social media.

Unfortunately, the rules we've developed within our own minds about how we 'should' be doing things often prevents us taking action and being an active presence in the lives of our audience and dream clients.

Yet, it's so important we show up and live our vision for the difference we're here to make in the world.

To truly live this vision, we need to find a way to transcend the internal rules, barriers and expectations which are simply preventing us living the mission and dream we have to serve the world powerfully.

We have to let our why be greater than our fears!

So instead of telling ourselves that 'the way' that we do things matters - it's about choosing to let the 'showing up' be what matters instead.

We need to choose to focus on the mission we're here for, and the change we wish to be a part of in the world - and let this lead the way.

So instead of being confused by the expectations, 'should's' and rules in our minds, we begin to lean more into what our heart is telling us. We lean into what feels good for us and what is our passion or 'calling' is inviting us towards instead.

When we let go of the 'should's' and lean into what we could do, we'll begin to truly enjoy everything more and start to feel more creative and impactful, instead of blocked.

To make this shift you can simply ask yourself:

💫 What could I be doing right now?

💫 What options are available to me?

💫 How can I show up in a way that feels good for me?

I'm going to use myself as an example here.

For many years, I didn't show up for my audience.

I was sporadic and inconsistent because I carried too many 'should's' about what showing up meant.

I believed video was the way forward to standing out in the online world - but I felt very personally very blocked around this.

I believed people weren't reading posts or blogs anymore and to leave my mark in the world I had to record video.

At the time I lacked confidence on video and didn't show up in my full power when I did.

I didn't feel I could share a message in a powerful way unless it was scripted and heavily edited or very well thought out and planned in advance.

But this barrier in my mind about perfecting things or showing up in a particular way, stood in the way of me stepping forward and just confidently doing it.

Yet these rules and barriers - though they felt very real to me at the time - didn't exist in the real world.

But they were big enough to stop me doing what I dreamed of. I would procrastinate and put things off.

Or I would create content on the odd occasion instead of consistently. Or I'd make more work for myself taking hours to record, edit and produce something I felt was 'suitable' to publish. By time I put it out there, the fire and energy from the process was gone and it became 'hard work'. I made it hard work for myself.

It was only when I started to let go of the rules and think how I could show up in ways that felt good for me, that I was able to show up consistently and enjoy it.

I started to consciously enquire with myself about what would feel good and help me to contribute my powerful voice in the world in a way that only I can.

I chose to own who I was uniquely - to step fully into my spiritual beliefs and blend my spiritual beliefs with my beliefs in science and evidence.

I decided to allow who I was uniquely to shine through in everything I created, by accepting myself for who I really was. The kind of person who speaks in a certain way - not necessarily a polished or edited way, but more a genuine authentic sharing of inspiration and ideas.

When I started to let go of the barriers and 'rules' I had for myself, showing up felt easier. It suddenly felt joy filled and exciting for me.

I began with writing - something I love to do. I love sharing my thoughts, ideas and insights in a written way because this is usually the way inspiration flows for me.

In giving myself permission to do what I loved - I began to feel more trust in myself and the process, knowing the people who were meant to find me would do so because I was living true to myself.

By letting go of what everyone told me I 'should' be doing or what I felt I 'should' be doing, I was able to decide how I wanted to show up.

I realised I can do this however I like. I'm an entrepreneur and business owner - I make the rules for myself. I can do what feels good, what lights me up and what's going to bring my most powerful, excited and inspired energy through for me.

I knew when I spoke from my heart in a way that felt meaningful, it would resonate with my dream clients and new people would flow into my world.

I also knew those that don't feel aligned would drop away and that was completely okay with me.

So rather than trying to be all things to everyone, I was able to fully step into being who I was, trusting this and having faith and confidence in myself.

Once the barriers dropped away, I was then able to show up more consistently.

This technique of 'doing what works for you', what brings you joy, what inspires you, what helps you feel creative and ready to shine your unique light and wisdom out into the world, is the very thing that will give you the confidence and desire to keep doing it.

But first you have to decide for yourself.

It's not about doing what everyone else is doing, but finding your own unique way of shining light into the world of your audience and clients. And letting your why be greater than your fears.

You can lean into your 'why' by asking yourself:

💫 Why are you here?

💫 Why are you running the business you are?

💫 Why did you choose this particular field and this particular area of expertise or interest or passion?

💫 What led you to this?

💫 What's the vision you have of the difference you're making in the world and with your dream clients?

💫 What's the vision that's pulling you along and excites you whenever you think of it?

Your 'why' will help you overcome any barrier that stands in your way.

When your 'why' is solid - any barrier that finds its way into your world will be faced with you actively looking for a way to overcome it.

Because your 'why' is bigger than you. It's bigger than your fears. It's bigger than your doubts and worries. It's bigger than any perfectionism which might still be standing in the way.

It becomes instead about your message. It becomes about the pure connection you have with those who are looking for exactly what you have to offer them.

There are people out there right now who need to hear from you. It may be only one or two people - but they need to hear from you today.

So isn't this motivation enough to let go of any perfectionism? To let go of everything having to be just right?

As an entrepreneur I know you have a drive and a dream to make a difference in the world.

And yet, we stop ourselves with thoughts like - 'I don't know what to say'. Or 'I'm confused about what I should be focusing on right now'. Or 'I don't want to add more noise to the internet'.

But it's not about noise - it's about spreading your message.

What is the most potent thing you have to offer the world right now?

When you talk about the same thing day after day after day - it will then reach those who need it most. It will reach those people that resonate with you, when you share it.

Yet if you don't share it. Or hold yourself back and wait for many months to share your message - then people will not receive what they need most from you - in the way that only you can share it. In the exact way only you can frame it and deliver it - using the exact stories and analogies that will hit home for them.

So while you hold back, you're doing the world a great disservice. You're depriving the world of your magic, your genius and your incredible wisdom that you have for a reason.

When you connect deeply with your 'why' and lean into it - you will begin to let all the barriers fall away.

You don't have to have everything perfect first! You can keep things simple and make it easy.

Instead of scripting your videos, preparing for days and editing them heavily - you can sit down and ask yourself;

💫 What is the message I most need to share with the world today?

💫 What do I most desire to share?

💫 And how do I most want to share this?

Write a note for yourself on a piece of paper that captures the essence of your message and leads the way. Then let your ideas flow easily from there.

You don't need to overthink things or spend too much time perfecting anything - but rather trusting yourself that if this is what you're passionate about and what you're called to share - that you'll find the words, you'll find the way to express whatever needs to be said.

When you lean into this process of flow and trust yourself, you'll show up powerfully without overthinking it. Your words will flow from the wise place within you - the spirit that's connected to everyone else in the universe.

It knows exactly what and how you need to say it, in that moment on that particular day.

There may be no-one who finds it and engages with it this week.

But maybe next week someone will open up their email to find the exact message they needed.

Or they might find it ten years after you created it. Suddenly it will hit home for them and they will binge all you've created because they feel it - 'THIS is exactly what I needed!'

We have to let go of any expectation that something has to land with people and get engagment straight away.

Or that if it doesn't land immediately that we've somehow failed.

You may be ahead of your time.

Perhaps you're sharing something people haven't got their heads around yet. And through that process of showing up repeatedly over and again people will start to 'get it'. They'll start to absorb it all, take it in and start to lean in closer to learn more.

They'll go back through all your posts, all your blogs, all your videos. And they'll start absorbing it with this new frame of mind, a new perception of how things work and a new appreciation for all you're sharing.

This is why its so important for you to let go, as much as you can, your fears, doubts and worries.

To lean into your why and to let your heart lead you.

To let things be easy. Not expecting yourself to be perfect in all you do.

Not expecting every post or reel you create to go viral.

Allow yourself the space to be human, to create from your heart and trust that what you're doing is exactly what the world needs.

And if not today, maybe next week or next year.

Then bask in the satisfaction of going to bed every night knowing - 'I created that!, I shared that and now it's out in the world for the right person to stumble on at the exact right moment for them'.

Isn't your 'why' absolutely worth it?

Before we finish up I want to say thanks again for taking the time out to join me today.

I hope this blog has helped you let go of the rules, barriers and expectations you've been carrying so you can show up more consistently and confidently for your audience.

Please leave a like or a comment below to let me know how this topic landed for you. Or share it with anyone you think might find it helpful too.

And if you'd love to shine your light more brightly out into the world so your dream clients can find you more easily - I've created something amazing for you!

Click here for instant access to my FREE Unleash the Magic Within Masterclass!

I just know you're going to love it!

Have a beautiful week!

Until next time, take care.

Lots of love,

Em xo